How Far Can They Go?
Will you tell your parents when you have this moment…
Crush on your classmate or colleague…
Committing a relationship with someone you know that they wouldn’t allow (moreover for very illogical reason)…
Wrecked mood after your brokenhearted…
Uncomfortable for having they both angry at each other because of that very unimportant stuff, once every two, three days, or once a week…
Or whenever you feel like you just don’t want to do anything, but being alone at your room for the whole Sunday…
Will you?
***
These bunch of questions came into my mind after I had a conversation with my friend over this article and Youtube video he sent me, discussing “Why Chinese Parents Don’t Say I Love You”.
Reading the article, I have got the point for why parents don’t do that kind of romance. Yet, I think more about it from my view, children view, (25 yo) daughter view.
Why Chinese Children Don’t Say I Love You.
Or, do you? I personally have no memory in my mind that I have ever done it in my entire life, saying I love you to my parents. It’s not that I don’t love them. But at some point in my very daily life, I just don’t feel like I can really go into them, in term of few kinds of things I question earlier.
Then it makes me sort of confuse to define whether a love I have to my parents have actually become a real parents-daughter-love, or it just turns into ‘children-should-respect-parents’ behavior.
Somehow I think, if you really love them and vice versa, you should be able to tell everything (especially the happiest and the worst thing happened in life) to them. While in my family, it just don’t happen.
I have locked my mind and body for telling this personal stuffs to parents because I have known how they will react afterward. None of their response will cool me down. I just know. So, what’s the point of telling them? Therefore, discussion just happened over something normative, not the sensitive, or more personal. I guess it’s probably wrong. Yet, I haven’t really got an idea how to be right.
If you kindly tell me what I should do… 🙂
***
http://www.dailylife.com.au/life-and-love/real-life/why-chinese-parents-dont-say-i-love-you-20140304-341ws.html
superhanny
Haha me too. Gak pernah cerita soal hati ke bokap nyokap. Ntar reaksinya aneh dan lebay *oh no*. Is that bad? :p
Anw, salam kenal!
vinnydubidu
Hore ada temann *toss!*. Iya beberapa orang yang kutanya bilang semua orang tua pasti bereaksi ‘lebay’ untuk urusan percintaan anaknya. padahal efeknya kan bikin anak malas cerita. hmm kenapa bisa begitu ya? haha.
Salam kenal juga! :))
nyonyasepatu
aku masih ngomong tapi ke nyokap dan sekali2nya bokap ngomong “we love u” pas aku di Surabaya hehehe
vinnydubidu
wah, serunya bisa ngomong begitu, mbak. kalau di aku, rasanya kok bakalan aneh sekalii ya. 🙂
Arman
you should (or even must) tell how you feel to your parents! some parents maybe not that expressive compared to other parents (my parents, fortunately, are quite expressive. we tell ‘i love you’ to each other since i was a little), but it does not mean that they do not love their children. believe me, all parents love their children.
if they don’t say it but you want them to say it, then you must start. instead of thinking why they don’t do this and that, why don’t you start telling them how you love them? why don’t you start showing how to treat someone you love?
i know it is not easy to change someone’s personality especially at our parents’ age. but nothing is possible. don’t ever think that there is no point for you to tell them what you think/feel. and it never hurts to tell your parents that you love them, does it? i bet your parents will be very happy hearing that from you… 🙂
start one step at a time. start from yourself. that will change your parents eventually. don’t expect to be very soon, but there should be a start point.
vinnydubidu
I always envy those family who can be that expressive. Now, I envy yours! ;p
Yes, there should be a start. I have started to show my ‘love’ to them by talking to them more than usual recently. Hope that this would be my starting point to start telling that I love them. I mean I don’t want to regret anything by the time I don’t have a chance to do so.
Thanks for the advice, Kak! 🙂